大学英语四级作文评分标准和等级
15分定为满分;占大学英语四级考试总分的15%。
第八期大学英语四级在线写作诊断主题:
Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write an advertisement on your campus website to sell a bicycle you used at college. Your advertisement may include its brand, specifications/features, condition and price, and your contact information. You should write at least 120 words but no more than 180 words.
范文:
Used bicycle on sale
A used Canyon bike is (available) on sale! Though used, it’s still a fast and reliable road bike, for it is well maintained and in good condition (which is) perfect for any standard of riders (beginner right through to competitive club cyclists) with suitable seat and strong tires.
The bike was bought two years ago for 1000 yuan, and it is now sold at only 388 yuan (so it is a real bargain! Besides, the price is negotiable)!
I want this bike to be sold as quickly as possible, for I am a senior student who is about to graduate and leave the campus in the near future. Please feel free to contact me if you are interested in this bike. I can be reached at phone 87654321 or by my e-mail 123@abc.com.
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19级信科学院学生稿件
老师评阅:
作文得分:8
作文点评:
·审题与内容:审题比较清楚,内容切题。以问句开头,是该文的亮点,可以起到吸引大家阅读的作用。
·衔接与连贯:文章第四段使用了first, what’s more, most importantly等词语衔接内容,一定程度上增加了连贯性。注意第二句和第三句之间衔接较松散,意义重复,可以使用连接词或重新组织内容来阐述其逻辑关系。再如此句I will give a low price on sale and it's a... two years.应为因果逻辑,但误用了and这一连词将之表述为并列关系。
·词汇使用:词汇使用较平实。
·语法结构:语法错误较多。主要体现为双谓语、时态使用错误等。
评阅人:大学英语教学部 王艺老师
18级中国语言文化学院学生稿件
老师评阅:
作文得分:13
作文点评:
·审题与内容:审题清晰,内容切题、完整。文章主体部分层次分明,条理清楚,结构分明。
·衔接与连贯:总体行文流畅、层次清晰。使用recently, now等词汇说明时间逻辑关系,使用because of, so说明因果逻辑,使用if开头的条件状语从句,表达更加委婉礼貌,在广告写作中使用得很恰当。
·词汇使用:文章词汇使用总体准确。
·语法结构:构句通顺,基本没有语法错误。可尝试简单句、长句复杂句等多种句式相结合,增加应用文写作句式表达的规范性和灵活性。
评阅人:大学英语教学部 王艺老师
19级经济学院学生稿件
老师评阅:
作文得分:11
作文点评:
·审题与内容:审题清晰,内容完整、切题。文章主体部分层次分明,第一段即开门见山,条理清晰。
·衔接与连贯:总体行文流畅,第一段第二句There are some details ... as follows,起到承上启下的作用。最后一段以To sum up表总结性的词组预示文章的结尾,增强了文章的连贯性。第二段在介绍自行车基本情况时,因为涉及内容较多,单句较多,可以增加连接词或将单句改写为从句等方式,增加内容的衔接性。
·词汇使用:文章词汇使用总体准确。文中except for, in a good condition, free from, a good helper, over-thinking等短语和词汇表达准确切题。
·语法结构:语法有个别小错。长短句、简单句从句结合,句式变化多样。
评阅人:大学英语教学部 王艺老师
19级经济学院学生稿件
老师评阅:
作文得分:84
作文点评:
·审题与内容:切题,表达较得当,清晰,文字通顺连贯,除了一些地方表达有些不够简练,如“I always treasured it when it took me wherever I wanted to go”.
·衔接与连贯:优点:能较好运用过渡词使作文条理通顺,如”firstly, as” etc.
·词汇使用:优点:较好使用了一些高级词汇和短语,例如approach, function well, negotiable, available.
·语法结构:较好使用了定语从句,分词短语,with结构,如with a solid bicycle frame,;改善之处:There is a classic forever mountain bicycle which accompanied me through my last college life and has to be sold as my graduation is approaching. 句子结构不太明晰;
评阅人:大学英语教学部 刘杰老师
19级管理学院学生稿件
老师评阅:
作文得分:86
作文点评:
·审题与内容:切题,文字连贯,表达得当,较好使用一些广告语,能使用反问的修辞手法,但表达不简练,如“Do you have a bike that belongs to you?”, “If you have a car, don't worry about it, because it's not a problem to put it in the driver's seat.”。“put it in the driver's seat.”表达内容也不正确。
·衔接与连贯:能较好运用过渡词使作文表达连贯通顺,如if, because,等。
·词汇使用:能使用一些高级词汇和短语,如“affordable”, “original”, “environmentally friendly’, etc
·语法结构:语法基本正确,除了一些小的错误如“If someone need help”,”take a actions” etc.
评阅人:大学英语教学部 刘杰老师
18级中国语言文化学院学生稿件
老师评阅:
作文得分:82
作文点评:
·审题与内容:表达切题得当,文字连贯,能较好使用反问的修辞手法,但有些表达不简练如“Its appearance is yellow and black,”。
·衔接与连贯:能运用过渡词使作文表达连贯,如Therefore, because,等
·词汇使用:能使用一些高级词汇和表达方式,如“80%new,negotiate,appropriate range,etc
·语法结构:语法大体正确,但有些语法错误,如缺谓语,“can not only convenient for us to travel”;表达不准确,如“Are you still hesitant to buy a new bicycle for too high a price?”,分词短语的错误运用“by the long distance traveled on campus?”
评阅人:大学英语教学部 刘杰老师
(大英部 王瑞英、CEO新媒体部)